"You are very fucking special."

Kiril's last performance was hard. I started crying before curtain, when Stephen Daldry, the director, came on stage and gave a speech about how it was Kiril's last performance, how much he'll be missed, and how he is one of the most talented young dancers in the world. I think unless you're a follower of the Broadway scene, it's hard to understand what a big deal Kiril's last performance was. He, along with David Alvarez and Trent, won the Tony for that role, and that's a really big deal. He's the first of the three original Billys, and the first Tony winner, to leave the show. These three kids have been working on this show for about three years, and that's a big deal. There was press there last night. I'm lucky I got a ticket, and I'm so glad that I sat as close as I did. It was worth it.

Anyway, Kiril came on to massive entrance applause, and his part during the opening song received a great deal of applause as well. Since there's a quick transition from that part back to the ensemble, there's not usually applause there, and I was happy to see such a great amount of support for him. I saw tears on his cheeks then, and I knew it would be a rough night. He was fantastic during the boxing scene, and his "put-off" dance went a lot longer than it usually does, and was particularly funny. He got a ton of applause during Solidarity when Billy achieves attitude promenade, and he seemed genuinely in awe of the amount of support in the theater. I had a particularly hard time with Solidarity, because Kiril was my first Billy, and Solidarity is the scene that made me fall in love with the show. He put his heart and soul into "Expressing Yourself," and during Billy and Michael's adlibbed part, Keean yelled out "it's your last one, better make it count!" And Kiril goes "I know, I'm trying to." And it broke my heart. During The Letter, Kiril was an absolute disaster, as was the audience, and as was Haydn Gwynne, who plays Mrs. Wilkinson. I knew that would be a tough scene, what with lines like "in everything you do, always be yourself," and "know that I will always be proud to have known you." The Letter is a goodbye, and last night, it really was. He put a ton of energy into Born to Boogie, even though he was still crying from The Letter, and that scene was a joy to watch. He and Haydn (who left the show today), seemed on the verge of both laughter and tears.

I had to pull myself together during intermission, and this girl I know a little bit came up to me and asked if I was okay, haha. During intermission, I realized I was sitting a few seats down from Kiril's mom, which was pretty cool. I recognized her both from press videos and when I've seen her at the stage door. I grabbed some napkins from the bar, because I knew I'd be needing them. I could see Kiril crying during "Deep Into the Ground." Swan Lake was gorgeous, but it always is with him, and he got A TON of applause after. I cried some more, and then it was time for Electricity, and I knew that would be the hardest part of the night. First of all, it's Billy's big moment, but second, I know that it's his favorite scene to perform, and he's brilliant at it. I could tell he was struggling with singing, and it got to the point where he was kind of just saying the words on beat, and I was sobbing. The dancing was fantastic, especially his no-hands flip, which I've never seen before, and Gregory Jbara, who plays Billy's dad, was in tears, as was 90% of the audience. The guy next to me handed me a tissue. After, the entire audience was on their feet clapping, and Kiril seemed genuinely touched by it. He looked out at the audience with this massive smile (and tears in his eyes), and it was a really beautiful, touching moment. He was freaking adorable when he gets his letter from the ballet school and informs his family, and Greg was funny in that scene as well. Once We Were Kings was hard to watch as Billy says goodbye to his town and his father, and The Letter (Reprise) was almost impossible. I thought I was going to have to leave. And of course, "see ya, Keean," "see ya, Kiril" at the end was a tearjerker as well. Curtain call was great, and he was obviously in tears. I put some pictures from Broadwayworld.com in, because I think they sum up the night.

The last time I'll see the board like this :( And yes, that says Keean Johnson.

Finish!

Kiril and my second favorite Matthew at curtain call.

Greg Jbara calling Kiril's family up on stage.

Heartbreaking.

And the stage door. Once again, a shitty picture of me. Oh well. The crowd was INSANE, and I'm so thankful that I hauled ass out of the theater and got up front. It took him an hour to get through everyone. Trent was there as well, and he was a mess. Tommy Batchelor got injured during the show last week so he's been out, and David Alvarez has been on vacation, so it's been Trent and Kiril all week, and Trent looked exhausted. That's a physically demanding role to play. But Trent also looked sad. One of my favorite little moments that I caught though was when Trent said to Maria Connelly, the new Debbie, "did David Bologna give you something to give to me?" And she said yes and ran inside to get it, and came back out with it, and it was a framed picture of David and Trent, and it made me remember that I miss David Bologna. Kiril was quiet as usual, but incredibly gracious and warm as well, and he seemed genuinely appreciative of everyone. He said he's staying in New York. Yay.

Anyway, Kiril is my favorite Billy, as I'm sure you all know by now. He plays Billy with this loneliness and vulnerability that Trent and Tommy both lack (though I love their takes on the role as well), and I will really miss him. I'm hoping he comes back for the first anniversary performance on November 13th, which I already have my ticket to. They brought the three original Billys back to the London anniversary, so fingers crossed. I'm going to take a quasi-break from the show. I want to see it once more before the anniversary performance, but only because that would make the anniversary performance my 10th time seeing it, and I think that would be special. Then I'll take another month long break before Tommy Batchelor's last show on the 11th of December. And when Trent leaves, I hope to be there as well.