Jesus Christ. It's not even a special occasion.

'Twas the night before Sunday
And all through the quad
The drunks were stirring out in a squad
The liquor was poured on the bar with such care
In hopes that their beer goggles soon would be there
The drunkards were naked in each other's beds
With visions of Meier danced in their heads
While Heather in her PJs and I in the nude
Made jokes in our beds that weren't even lewd
When up on the roof there arose such a clatter
"What's that I hear? I think that's a shatter!"
Away to the window, yes, I did flash
When dressed in the nude you hardly can clash
When what to our wandering eyes should appear
But some drunken assholes with bottles of beer
One stood by the bushes and took out his dick
And said in a moment "I MUST BE ST. NICK!"
More rapid than cattle coming back to the ranch
The drunkards they stumbled right into the Branch
"Now, Yager. Now, Captain. Now, Bud light and Pucker.
On Coors Light, On Freeze Pops, On Smirnoff and Nonster!
Now hide your fake before the cops come to call
And dash away, dash away, dash away all!"
As the hours go by, oh how time flies
Now it's time for last call, so say your goodbyes
So back to their dorms the drunkards they flew
With a gut full of beer, and lost dignity, too
And then, in a tinkling, I heard from the door
The sound of a drunk courting the floor
As I drew in my hand the Ouiji Board around
Down the chimney Evil God came with a bound
He said "campus is drunk. I feel your pain.
But because you disturbed me, I'll make it rain."
In the dorm room next door, I heard a bed squeek
And thought "Jesus Christ, guys. I'm trying to sleep."
-Heather and Kayleigh (mostly Kayleigh)

So anyway, campus is particularly drunk and obnoxious (aka angry) tonight. We don't have a problem with drunkenness, obviously...but people are freaking insane. And a lot of them are angrily yelling in the campus center.